Proud mama moment #47653956

"Mama, today was kind of a sad day.  Can we talk when you get home?"

At this age and with this particular kid, I wasn't sure whether to take it seriously.  Honestly, I thought she was going to tell me something happened to a book character.  Or, maybe, someone didn't like the new shirt she was wearing.  But she came with me while I got ready for my movie date with her sister so we could have a "private" talk.

"Do you remember M.  that I said used to be a good friend?"

"Yes, as of this morning she was one of your best friends....what happened?"

"Have you ever heard of the 'salt and pepper factor'?"

"I think so, but you tell me what you think it means."

"A. told me today that it's when black people and white people have babies."

"Yep.  Why? Did you use that term?"

"No.  I don't like it.  But M. is a racist. She said she doesn't like salt & peppers."

"Ok.  Well, we can't help ignorant people."

"She said I was a jerk."

"Why?"

"Because I told her she shouldn't say that."

"Well, I think you and I can agree which one of you is the jerk here.  Right? Is that why you're sad?  Because she called you that?"

"No, it's sad because I can't be her friend anymore because she is a racist."

"It's sad that you lost a friend, but it's good that you get to choose what kind of people you want to be around.  And you're choosing not to hang with people who are stupid."

"Yeah."

My Sofia took a stand yesterday.  In the often land mine-filled halls of the middle school, my kid chose a side.  At an age when kids just want to be accepted and liked, my preteen girl gave up one of her best friends because she knows what is right.  And she did it on her own.  She didn't come home and ask what she should do.  She didn't waffle about whether this would be good for her image.  She didn't even care that this kid wasn't directly insulting her.  Sofia drew a line in the sand and didn't waver a bit.

I hate that the girls are surrounded by the ignorance and blind hatred that many think disappeared long ago.  It infuriates me that my kid was introduced to a term that should be reserved for the hair of distinguished men and superfluous table shakers.  But, my oh my, how proud I am of her backbone.  Strong and secure, she leads the way.  And, I would follow her anywhere.