Relationship advice to the girls. Part X

I bet you're wondering why I think I'm qualified to give you this advice.  I imagine you've read through this series and thought "what the hell does she know about a successful relationship?".  As much as I would like to believe that, by the time you need these tips, I will have gotten it right - history shows me that I probably won't.  So, here's why I hope you listen to me...

I have made every mistake.  I have chosen every wrong path.  I have been every don't.  And, I don't want you to feel the way I do.  I want to have made those errors on your behalf.  I want to believe that I went ahead of you and laid down all the Caution!, Do Not Enters! and Crime Scene tapes.  

I want you to be hopeful.  I want you to believe.  I want you to love.

I want you to choose what happens to you.  So, choose someone who makes you happy.  *you don't have to swing from chandeliers, but light up the room in your own way*

Choose the one you catch watching from across the room with a quiet smile.  *unless you've already taken out a restraining order against him.*  

Choose someone who makes you laugh.  *especially one who makes you laugh at yourself*  

Choose someone because your best friend approves.  *not the slutty friend who uses you to hold her purse, the true friend who tells you the truth.  She can see things in you that you can't and she will only approve of the man who is good for you*  

Choose someone who challenges you.  *you don't have to win every fight to win every fight*

And, know when to let go.  I never found out if you just know when you've met the right one, but I am completely sure that you just know when to let go.  Don't wait or barter or excuse.  It doesn't get better with time.  Beginnings are the fun, exciting part.  Middles are where the love comes (or doesn't). But the ends are where the most hard fought lessons are learned.  Don't be afraid of that.

Finally, make some mistakes.  Some of the best times I've had started as huge errors in judgement.  Most of the people who effected me the most came into my life at surprising, inopportune, or dark times.  And, while I may not like the scars, I don't regret the experiences.  Mistakes don't define you - thank goodness.

Relationship advice.  Believe.  Love.  Try.  As many times as it takes.

I love you all.