It was ugly.
And it was stupid.
A clogged toilet.
But not over the fact that it was clogged.
Not that it's clogged at least three times a week.
Not that, once again, no one told me it was clogged.
Not even that, once again, at least one person used it after it was clearly already clogged.
No. I was melting down because I couldn't pass this ridiculous chore on to someone else. Because I've never been able to yell out "Honey, could you help me with this please?". Because there's no one around to say "hey, it's my turn. I got this".
And, last night, I just wanted to have a better half. Hell, I'd have settled for a half-assed half.
But that's not my path anymore. Instead, I pulled myself together, unclogged the toilet, and moved on to the next task. The next chore I can't share. The next problem I don't have the Y chromosome for. The next insurmountable mountain.
And I handled it on my own; without the benefit of that storied extra set of hands, I performed the next miracle.
Because, single mamas, we know miracles. We are masters of the slight-of-hand magic that others never see. We got this.
Not every miracle is one they name saints for.
Sometimes the miracle is holding our eyes open though the entire story our kid just has to tell us well past bedtime.
Sometimes it's the birthday present they were sure we couldn't get them.
Sometimes it's a feast we saved up weeks for.
Sometimes it's figuring out the air compressor that's been dormant in the garage for two years so that we can air up the ball for driveway soccer.
Sometimes the miracle is showing up at school with the homework that was shoved behind the dresser.
Sometimes it's getting dinner on the table in record time so that she gets to practice in time to show them how it's done.
Sometimes it's keeping a roof over their unimpressed heads and clothes on their ungrateful behinds.
And, sometimes, the miracle is unclogging the toilet for the third time in as many days.
We single mamas may not necessarily want to be miracle workers, and we may be failing 64.8% of the time. But, it only takes one miracle to keep the ship afloat.
And, sometimes, the miracle is that we don't just jump off that ship and let ourselves drown.
Oh dear! What a nightmare! It's really stressful being a single mother and having to do all those things by yourself. Being a single mother is tough, but it lets you discover a lot of things about yourself. Just like what you discovered by that clogged toilet, right? You now know that you can do it and you don’t always need a man to complete you. :D
ReplyDeleteSheryl August @ Mr. Rooter Plumbing
Cheer up, Sarah! I hope you’re not considering yourself a failure, just because there are things you can’t do easily. In fact, I admire your resilience for trying to figure out things and how to fix them, regardless of those hurdles on your way. However, you don’t have to do all of those things on your own all the time. For one, there are people who would be happy help you with the compressor and clogged toilets. I suggest you leave those things to the pros, especially if it seems that the problem is already too big to handle on your own.
ReplyDeleteLovella Cushman @ Perfection Plumbing