Ponytails and pancakes

Ponytails and pancakes

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Lost and Found

I have someone to put in the lost and found.  It's my Maya.  Well, someone's Maya.  There's not a single chance she's mine.  See, Maya is practically made of tulle.  She will only wear dresses... the frillier the better.  And, I don't know where it came from.  Yesterday, she and I went back and forth about her lunch.  I wanted her to eat it, she wanted me to shove it.  I threatened to not allow a snack, "So?" she replied.  I threatened no dessert after dinner, "So?" she replied.  I threatened to remove the dress she was wearing and replace it with jeans... mad dash to the table.  Now, before you call DFS on me, these were brand new jeans Santa brought her.  Mama, of course, would never give her jeans.  Mama knows better... stupid Santa!

Mama doesn't wear dresses.  Mama counted her collection today, and she has FOURTEEN pairs of sweatpants.  Fourteen.  Granted, these are the fabulous Victoria's Secret Pink sweatpants.  If you don't have a pair, you are clearly missing out.  They are not your mother's shabby sweats.  I could go on and on about how much I love them.  But, if you've seen me out in the last four years, you've seen them. They are my uniform.  You know those mothers who are always put together?  The women who always look like they just stepped out for a lunch with their equally well put together friends?  The women who wouldn't dream of leaving their homes without a face full of makeup and their hair looking perfect?  Yeah, I hate those witches.  I know a few myself.  It's a lot of pressure to be seen with them, and I often feel bad that they have to be seen with me.  But, I'm not going anywhere that I need to dress up for.  The cashier at the grocery store doesn't care if I come in heels or tennis shoes, just as long as I don't fold up my coupons.  I am simply not a high maintenance woman. 

This brings me back to Maya.  Somewhere in the world (though hopefully not in Tonganoxie, KS) there's a little boy who has no idea what's heading his way.  I almost feel for him.  Almost.  This little girl is a handful and a half.  We went out the other day, appropriately dressed in a frilly dress from Santa and a flower in her hair, and she was sweating.  Why was my angel sweating?  Because she refused to even unzip her coat.  Why would this sweet child refuse to unzip her coat (let alone remove it) while indoors?  Because she decided the dress wasn't cute enough to be seen in.  Sigh.  Maya is a three year old diva.  And, I am simply her pawn.  Somewhere in this world there is also a woman.  A really well put together woman walking around in nice clothes with her hair done and her nails manicured.  And that woman is walking around with a 3 year old in sweatpants and a pony tail.  That lady probably wonders where she went wrong. 

She should look in the lost and found.

2 comments:

  1. And I'm the mother of 3 boys wishing I had a little girl to dress up in dresses made of tulle, crocheted purple sweaters, tights, boots, accessories for her hair, etc.:-) instead, I've been blessed with boys who care for nothing but electronics and cars.

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  2. LOL - that is really funny Sarah! And you're right I only see her in dresses. I'm like you though, I'm good just to be presentable in public. Thanks for following me!!

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